Thursday, February 28, 2008

The Hell That Is AV

This Sunday I respecced dps for a PvP week. The reason for this is that I was starting to take the game too seriously and needed a little time to cool off, but I didn't want to stop playing all together.It being a PvP week I found it quite strange that in the first three days I did one heroic and six normal instances.

PvP Day 1

Anyway I digress, when I respecced the first thing I did was go and check out what daily PvP quest was, and it turned out to be AV. Ok I had never done much AV before so I thought I'd give it a go, plus I really want the PvP axe and I need 40 AV marks of honor for it ... 6 games later with no wins I was chewing on my keyboard in frustration. I decided to abandon the quest and call it a night.

PvP day 2

Ok it's a new day and a fresh start I pop down to see what the daily PvP quest is today and lo and behold it's AV again, damn I hate that place but it's the daily and I need those marks ... In I go, 4 games later I had progressed from my keyboard to giving my monitor a good mastication. Like I said before I haven't done much AV up until now and I'm still not completely sure whats going on. It doesn't help me any that 4 different people are giving out 4 different strategies at the same time, and arguing their strategy with such compelling cases as "STFU n00b" and "your all n00bs EVERYONE GO TO SWGY NOW". Then on the 5th game we won, I was so used to losing at this stage it came as a huge surprise and I entirely missed what went on. One minute I was beating on some npc who was running around b%tch slapping anyone who got in his way and the next it was over and to my amazement we had won.
WOW what was that?
Look at all the honor I got!
Maybe the alliance are finally getting good at AV.
No such luch as my next two games we get bottle necked in and lose by attrition as usual. At this point I'm considering the value of that PvP axe vs the cost of dental surgery and replacement PC parts. I call it a day on PvP and wonder off in a sore toothed daze to do my dailies and some dental friendly PvE.

PvP Day 3

From this point on I will be referring to specific points on the AV map so I have helpfully provided a labeled map with these positions marked for those of you who, like I did, don't do AV.



Ok here we are on day 3 I still need more mark from AV but I'm willing to preserve my sanity by going into whatever BG the daily PvP quest is for and grind honor on that for a while. I port into Stormwind and stroll down to the keep to check out the daily quest.
Nnnnooooooooooooo!!!
AV AGAIN!!
I'm starting to think that there is a conspiracy out there trying to drive me insane by weaponizeing Alterac Valley for the military and using me as a test subject (Day 3 the subject is showing sever homicidal and suicidal tendencies, and on a side note is showing sever dental degradation).
Anyway I break out the tinfoil hat I keep in the closet to stop them scanning my brain waves and x-raying my teeth and jump into AV. The first game goes as usual. We attack Glav, kill glav (I know where he is at this point), too many die and we get pushed back past the choke point ant the war of attrition starts, we lose. I see the pattern here, I enter AV, I waste half an hour of my life and come out with one AV mark. Now I only have to do this 22 more times and I'll have the marks I need for my axe, I'm resigned to it now and can deal with it without chewing on the hardware.
Oh so wrong.
I go on to win the next 6 games in a row, all useing the same tactic of everyone zerg down to FWGY capture that, half stay to defend it while the other half move on to capture the FWRH and the two towers up there. Once we have captured both graveyards we run in and beet the hell out of Drek. End result we win. YAY. Now I have nearly all the marks I need and about 3000 honor. Double YAY. Riding the PvP high I jump back in for another 5 games, 3 of which we lose, but that doesn't matter as I now know we can win and by what tactic. I call it a night again log off having netted myself all the marks i need and about 4000 honor.

PvP Day 4

I log on having logged off next to the daily PvP quest giver and check the quest.
What?!?
AV ... AGAIN?!?
Thats alright I can handle it now I know we can win ... But now I'm sure that the conspiracy is real.
(Day 4 the test subject shows signs of elation and a notable lack of hardware mastication ... suggest moving into phase 2)
I add another layer to my tinfoil hat, add a tinfoil face mask to block signals from the pressure sensors they have implanted in my teeth, and jump into AV with a vengeance. I play 5 games straight only wining one, sometimes using the tactic that worked yesterday sometimes not. I take a break and go do my dailies. I come back (this is PvP week after all) and do some more AV winning some and losing others. Suddenly I notice I'm back to chewing my keyboard everytime we lose, 2 straight loses later I've moved back up to putting bite marks in my monitor.

This then people is the hell that is AV.
First you go in with the attitude of we always lose better get used to it.
Then it shows you that you can win and look at all that juicy honor you got to boot.
Your feeling good now aren't you?
Now AV throws the sucker punch. It shows you that you can win and now it only lets you win very occasionally sending you into a fit of PC munchies with every loss. Yet it draws you back in with promises of massive quantities of honor if you win.

The Moral

Yes Alterac Valley can be great for grinding honor ... but for the sake of your sanity quit now before it's too late, it's already got me don't let it get you too ... I'm almost looking forward to respeccing back to prot at the end of the week.








(Operation AV a complete success. The subject has show a direct correlation of mental and dental degradation to the amount of Alterac Valley played ..... I suggest moving the project into mass production.)



P.S. I stayed up late just to find out what the daily PvP quest was and it was AB, I guess my days as a military test subject are over and the tinfoil hat can go back in the closet ... Now I just wish the transmitter in my teeth would stop broadcasting FM radio ... or at least that it would choose a better station.

3 comments:

Kartheis said...

Stunty...




Genius! Pure Genius all of it ^_^


Anywayz, you might have noticed now since 2.4 came out AV was won by the alliance quite alot of the time, i decided to make rough guesses of the BG wins for alliance =)

Pre 2.4 - AV, 15% Win
EOTS,35% Win
AB, 30% Win
WSG,40% Win

After 2.4 - AV,60% Win
EOTS,40% Win
AB,30% Win
WSG,50% Win

Just from Self Experience.

But.... Ghostlandian Alliance seems to be going back into old habits again AV is still hell.=/

Still, will never give up.;)

Stuntyone said...

Yes I noticed that we win more AV's now ... but I wrote this in a fit of PvP induce fury before 2.4 came out.

I now almost enjoy AV (If such a thing is possible)

wow strategy fan said...

this is sweet! thanks!