Thursday, March 13, 2008

Five Seconds Please!!!

The Rant

You nasty, evil, hateful people. Your destroying my sanity. And I bet your doing it on perpose.

Ok, from the tital and the first line can you determine who I'm refering to? Thats right. I'm talking to you dps junkies out there. Bad dps junkie, BAD! Turn that damage meter off right now! Or at least hide it untill the end of the run, because I know your eyes are glued to that and not the threat meter. Because of you I'm currently reserching a way to puch you through my internet connection, and all my experiments have so far given me is a sore fist and a broken phone.

Why this rant you ask? Well let me tell you I'm sick and tired of being asked to tank and then not being alowed to do my job. I mean ok if I'm only tanking one mob at a time, fair enough, wait until I hit the bugger then go nuts and if I can't keep ahead of you on threat then somthing is seriously wrong, or I'm just being lasy. But, and it's a big but, (no pun intended) when I'm tanking 2, 3, 4, or in those rare and frustrating cases, 5 mobs you have to give me more time to generate the initial threat. Look at it this way I can generate (rage dependant) 800-1000 tps (threat per second). Cool yeah? All well and good, but in the initial stages of a two mob pull thats split between the two, meaning I only generate 400-500 tps.

Why is this important you ask? Are you one of those people who managed to get to lvl 70 and geared up in the BG's without ever learning about threat? Thats the only reason I can think of for you giving me such a hard time. You are? Then allow me to enlighten you on the subject.

About Threat

Me: First things first. Each mob has a threat list and the reason he attacks someone is because that person is top of his threat list.

Dps Junky: What causes threat?

Me: Good question. All kinds of things cause threat, like spells, healing and damage done.

Dps J: But I do a lot more damage than the tank so wouldn't I cause more threat? I mean just look at my damage meter I'm miles above the tank.

Me: Ordinaraly that would be true. Hang on a minute, WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT THE DAMAGE METER! GO STICK IT WHERE THE SUN DOESN'T SHINE! And I don't mean Ireland despite the popular belief or it's inhabitants (myself included).

Me: Back on topic. Yes ordinaraly more damage = more threat, but tanks have abilities that generate much more threat than a normal attack would, and so while doing less than a third of your damage can generate as much or more threat, thats not to say that even what they are doing their job you cant pull aggro off the tank so always watch your threat meter carefuly as a good string of crits could take you way up the threat list.

Dps J: But I don't have a threat meter.

Me: You don't have a threat meter, yet you have a damage meter? GO GET ONE NOW! WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE? MOVE, MOVE, MOVE, MOVE!!

Dps J: I'm back and I have my threat meter now.

Me: Ok I'm calm I'm calm. Lets take a look at some of a warriors threat generating abilities from the perspective of the mob. All of the listed abilities cause much higher amounts of threat than a normal attack, bar the pull. I shall put the mechanics of the ability in perenthesis, not the full mechanics, but enough for you to understand whats happening when the warrior uses them.

Why You Let The Tank Pull: That bugger just shot me!! Lets get him Lads. (Generates threat through damage and entering the mobs aggro zone first)

Heroic strike: Did you see that fancy move he just hit me with? Did you? And it hurt. Well I'll show him. (On next normal attack, extra damage)

Devastate/Sunder Armour: What the hell?!? He's breaking up my precious armour. We can't be having with that now. (Extra attack that reduces the targets armour value, stacks up to 5 times, and causes damage in the case of devestate)

Shield Slam: He just hit me in the face with his shield! Your gonna pay for that! (Extra attack that requires a shield)

Revenge: He just avoided my attack and then hit me with that fancy move. Gggrrrrrrrr!!! MOB SMASH!! (bonus attack that must follow a dodge/block/parry)

Taunt: That mage just hit me with a HUGE fireball, better go kill her. Wait a minute! What did that warrior just call my mother???? (The warriors threat is now equal to the highest threat on the targets threat list and the mob will focus on the warrior for a short period regardless of threat).

Dps J: If the warrior has all these cool abilities why can I still pull aggro?

Me: Thats because of that annoying 1.5 second Global Cool Down we warriors have on most of our abilities :*( . This means that if you give me 3 secconds, I only get too use two of those abilities. Damn you GCD!!!

What You Should Do

Me: Ok now Mr. Dps Junky, I have educated you on the subject of threat.

Dps J: But what do I do with this new information?

Me: It's simple really. I want you to give me just a few seconds to generate threat before you attack.

Dps J: How many is a few?

Me: Fair question. Let me give you a simple guide line. If I only have to tank one mob at a time just give me one second, and for each extra mob add two seconds. So for example if I had to tank 2 at once give me 3 seconds, if I have to tank 3 give me 5 seconds, and if I have to tank 3 give me 7 seconds. So on and so forth.

Me: So I hope everyone has learned something today. Also I have bought a new phone so don't think I won't continue my experiments if you continue with your hateful, evil ways.

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